3 tips on handling racial micro-aggressions!

Fam,

If you read this title and thought, “but why does it have to be about race again?

You have three option here:

  1. Have an open mind that you may have been living in a privileged bubble leaving you completely unaware of other people’s realities. This kind of attitude is highly welcomed on the blog.
  2. Read out of curiosity and should you have strong contradicting comments, take a seat and ask yourself “do I have context?” and if the answer to that is yes, ask yourself again “do I R.E.A.L.L.Y have context?
  3. You could stop reading this article from here. To be fair we can’t always agree with everything we read on the internet. There are all manner of people out here and they won’t always be on the same page as you.

They may come across as pretty harsh options, but here is the thing, some people are having it harsh out here because of their skin colour. It’s not even funny, so don’t expect the article to be fun.

If you read this title and thought “Oh look, something relatable, definitely reading this” – I am happy I published something worthwhile for you.

Pick your option, let’s get straight into this, okay?

Disclaimer: This article is based on conversations I’ve had with minorities working in Europe and America for various companies. Being Miss I, I decided to pen what I advise minorities that are struggling in the workplace, in case there is someone out there suffering and I don’t get a chance to talk to them face-to-face, they can read this and hopefully improve their quality of Life.

  1. If your employee rights are being compromised, don’t make the mistake of suffering in silence: I get it, you don’t want to come across as a complainer. But you’d better be one than allowing the cause of your suffering to affect your relationships, both at work and personal. YOU WERE NOT HIRED TO SUFFER, and it’s expected that you SPEAK UP when your employee rights are compromised. Did you sign a contract with the following statements “I accept to be treated as if I am less of a human?” I accept to allow others to mistreat me“I am not worthy of a fair work environment” If the answer to all those questions is NO, then S.P.E.A.K UP!

What you should do?

You need to speak up ASAP because it is easier handling some of these things early. People are often advised to record everything that happened, but no one tells them that it increasingly becomes hard to get justice. Unfortunately there are many loopholes in handling employee grievances, so your best choice is to get out of the situation as soon as you can. 

  • Quickly identify trusted colleagues. This is a hard one because how do you quickly identify those you should trust with a sensitive topic such as this one? This is why it helps to be part of the political grapevine, you know who might have gone through something similar and managed to get out of it. But if you hate politics, best get down to proper research to identify who you should trust. If you are in luck, the right people will reach out to you, and when they do, be open and trust them.
  1. Never expect people who constantly give feedback that it’s not a race issue to understand racial micro-aggressions . All they need to do is to care and be empathetic, you can’t really teach someone to care. The sooner you realize this, the less time and emotions will be wasted trying to get people on the same page as you. Just give up and pray that they understand one day. Of course it will be too late for them to support you, but at least the next set of minorities they deal with – won’t have to suffer as much.

What you should do?

  • Simple: Continue talking to the trusted colleagues.
  1. Don’t entirely accuse senior leadership or the company for what you are going through, blame that one person that is racist: Often I’ve had to stop people from quitting their jobs because they would be like “this company this, that company that” – EXCUSE ME, why should an entire company be blamed for the actions of one person? Did other colleagues do the same thing? Have you had great moments at work? Exactly – don’t be quick to blame an entire organization for the actions of one person.

What you should do?

  • Option 1: Quit: Honestly if you feel like you don’t have the mental capacity to take it anymore, quit. If you feel like you will get worse by staying, leave. Health first, Peace first, Happiness first. I believe those that understand your situation will support this decision should it be the one you want to make.
  • Option 2:Fight”: If you have the mental capacity to inspire change in your company, do it. If everyone quits, we will have a vicious cycle of minorities getting disappointed company after company because the ones that came before them did not “fight.” Of course health and well-being is paramount, so take care of yourself and empower those you trust to walk with you.

Should you be in a situation where you are suffering, I will pray for you this evening. I will ask God to give strength to all minorities dealing with racial micro-aggressions. Amen.

I don’t know when exactly you will break out from that draining situation, but what I know for sure is that the following three things will happen:

  • You will get out of the situation: The only constant thing in Life is change, so don’t worry, things will eventually change.
  • You will learn a lot, and become such a badass while at it: Something about suffering that helps with self-discovery and less fucks given.
  • You will realize that the situation always starts as the worst thing that can ever happen to someone, but then your badass self makes you realize that you are WAY stronger than your challenges.

Goodluck!

 

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